Stop Comparing Yourself to Others #SelfLove

At the start of the year, I was a woman on a mission. 2017 was going to be the year I got my mojo back, the year I would feel normal again, and the year I would dedicate to the personal development of my mind, body, and soul.

I’ve already made positive progress towards nurturing my mental and physical health. However, during my mindfully-infused sessions where I take the time to learn and grow, I’ve noticed an uncomfortable trend – comparison. We all do it, but it’s in varying degrees of intensity. I’ve often wished that I could live in a warm country like my hugely successful cousin, Becky. Or that I drove a super sexy Land Rover Evoque like my bestie, Liz. These are the kind of comparisons that are merely fleeting thoughts rather than crippling destruction for our self-esteem. I love these thoughts because they shape my ambitions. I want to earn enough to buy a lovely car, and I want to travel to interesting places.

In January I bought a

Ditch the Guilt #SelfLove #Happiness

February is the month of love, but here on Motivate Me! we’re looking at loving ourselves rather than joining the masses who are celebrating with their one and only. If you do have a true love close to hand, then feel free to engage in the odd snuggle, a romantic meal, or a deep and meaningful discussion about your relationship. Communication, interaction, and respect are key elements to any successful partnership.

If, however, you want to join me on a journey of self-discovery and take a deeper look at how we can love ourselves first, then stick with me.

Last week I shared my 5 Top Tips for Working on Self-Love, you can read that post HERE. This week I wanted to discuss an area that might impact on our personal development, and hold up our well-laid plans of loving ourselves unconditionally.

That issue is GUILT. Not in an ‘oh my god, I slept with my husband’s brother!’ way, although if you did do that, then you might want to skip off and sort that issue out!

The guilt I’m talking about today includes all the mistakes or mundane nonsense we beat ourselves up about. It could be that we weren’t there when someone needed us, or you’ve shouted at the kids over something trivial. For me, I feel guilty about my overwhelming ironing pile (I know, it sounds ridiculous doesn’t it!). In truth it makes me feel like I’m neglecting my family, failing as a mother and adds to my ever present ‘I’m not good enough’ limiting belief, I mean, seriously, who beats themselves up because of the ironing?

January in Review #Blogging #Goals

January Review

I didn’t strictly adhere to my ‘must write a new year resolution list’ at the start of the month, in fact, I adopted an altogether new approach for 2017 which involves only a few goals, and a more laid back attitude. So far, so good.

One of the goals I did set for my blog was to publish a monthly review where I could check stats, assess the posts I’ve written and the interaction they received, as well as sharing the links in case anyone missed one. Over previous years I’ve been a bit lax with analytics, but I’ve come to realise that if I want to provide valuable content, then I need to see what you, my dearest blog reader, enjoys.

I have also been asked to provide a few guest posts for other blogs this month, and I’ve embarked on a couple of advertising boosts to lift the profile of my blog and hopefully get my articles in front of a wider audience, after all, that’s the whole point of writing. I want to help as many people as I can to embrace their best self, to be confident in their skin, and to believe that they can achieve anything they want.

How was January?

Stats:

I’m delighted with the increase in views. Overall, the blog received 15,075 new visits which is an incredible leap. Yay! The most popular post of the month was Adopt a Skinny Thinking Routine to Help with Your Weight Loss.

Published Posts:

Week1 – How to Ensure You Have a Great Year Using a Happiness Jar

Week2 – Releasing Negative Emotions

Week3 – How to Avoid Self-Sabotage

Week4 – Adopt a Skinny Thinking Routine to Help Your Weight Loss

Guest Posts:

Rosie Amber’s Blog – Week 1 How to Review the Last 12 Months

Rosie Amber’s Blog – Week 2 Power Words for 2017 

Rosie Amber’s Blog – Week 3 Setting Goals for 2017

Rosie Amber’s Blog – Week 4 Planning for a Perfect Year 

Socially Shared Business Network – Change Your Beliefs and Change your Life

Goals for February:

February is the month of love! Those of you who know me well will understand when I reach for the sick bucket. I don’t ‘do’ romance. Actually, that’s not strictly true; I’ve never met anyone who does romance and I therefore only know about flowers, chocolates, and romantic weekend trips because I’m a sucker for a rom-com film (sshh, don’t tell anyone).

As I can’t produce love infused blog posts from a personal perspective (unless we count my horrific experiences on a dating site!), I thought I’d concentrate on self-love. I know a great deal about this topic as it’s one of my main goals for 2017 – learning to appreciate myself, flaws and all, and turning the negative inner dialogue into positive self-talk. February’s theme will cover this in more detail, and I hope you enjoy reading my posts on this subject.

Over to You:

Your mission if you choose to accept it is…

I thought it might be a fun twist if at the end of every monthly review I set you some fun exercises. I want you to think about the following questions, grab your journal and note down any thoughts or feelings that bubble to the surface or feel free to add your thoughts in the comments below.

Q1. Where do you see yourself in 5 years? What small steps can you take between now and December 31^st to achieve it?

Q2. What does a day in the life of your dreams look like? Write your perfect day from the minute you wake up to when you go to bed. Where are you, who are you with, what would you do?

Q3. If money was not an issue what career would you have or what lifestyle would you adopt?

I’ll add another three questions to the February review. You don’t need to share your answers; they’re for your personal development. If you can keep all your notes together in one journal then by the end of the year, you’ll have a great overview of 2017 to work with when you want to do a review, set goals, or release anything that isn’t serving your greater purpose. Until next month.

Thanks for visiting my blog, I hope you enjoyed this post. Want more? Connect with me here:  Twitter @ShelleyWilson72, Instagram or check out my Facebook pages http://www.facebook.com/FantasyAuthorSLWilson and http://www.facebook.com/MotivateMeBlog. You can also find me on Pinterest

How to Avoid Self-Sabotage

For thousands of people across the globe, the New Year is a time for goal setting. Whether you believe in resolutions or not, we can’t help but feel slightly inspired to create a few ‘I’d like to do…’, or ‘I will achieve…’ situations for the year ahead.

As you all know, I do love a good list writing session, and jotting down all the possibilities a new year brings would be my perfect Saturday night! I haven’t been as regimented with my resolutions for 2017. My recent illness and battle with depression and anxiety have taken the shine off setting too many challenges. However, the goals I have set for myself are still bold enough to push me out of my comfort zone and keep me focused.

One of my main faults is a tendency for

Releasing Negative Emotions

I’m only into the second week of the year, and I’ve already steered away from my lovingly constructed blog schedule! However, in my defence, I have a valid reason for needing to throw all my well-laid plans aside and share this story, and that’s because it HURT!

Since the middle of last year, I have had regular acupuncture sessions with a wonderful therapist called Jo, who is insightful, compassionate, and highly skilled. I know without any doubt that the sessions are making a difference, not just physically, but emotionally.

We talk through so many issues, and Jo has an incredible knack for getting

Re-Balance Your Life by Looking Back #reflection

It's been a hectic week at Resolution Challenge HQ. As many of you know, the month of November is when I take part in the annual NaNoWriMo contest - National Novel Writing Month. This is my fourth year of writing a 50,000 word novel in 30 days and so far (6 days in) I'm at just over 13,000 words. It's shaping up to be a good project, and one I hope to share with you all next year once the edits are done.

I'm delighted to have found my mojo again for writing motivational non-fiction, and this is evident in the exciting projects I've got coming up. My mind is bubbling over with ideas, and I’m struggling to get them all written down before my batty brain forgets them. There are several projects in the developmental stages and one in the OMG this might actually happen phase! I’ll keep you posted.

It’s nice to be feeling like my old self again. It’s been a main aim of mine for a while now, to try and

What Does Happiness Mean To You? #MondayBlogs

I was invited to do a talk for a motivational group recently on the theme of ‘Heaven on Earth.' I spent a long time thinking about what that meant to me.

Eventually, I decided that happiness was the one thing that gave me contentment. But sometimes we think that happiness is out of our reach – it’s something to work towards – a goal if you like.

When I’m at home, and I talk about setting goals, I can see my kid’s eyes begin to glaze over. ‘Oh god, she's off on one of her hippie trips again!’

That’s okay; they’re young. Goals aren’t as important to them. For them, happiness is already a huge part of their life; they don’t need to think about setting goals to achieve it.

Believe to Achieve at the Wellbeing Festival, Birmingham #MondayBlogs

In 2015 the Mind Body Spirit Wellbeing Festival arrived in Birmingham. For me, this was a huge bonus as I live a mere ten minutes away from the National Exhibition Centre, so there was no early morning train to London, or late evening return loaded down with shopping bags and good intentions. My favourite festival was on my doorstep!

This year, I’m more excited than usual but not for the reasons I mentioned above, no, this year I’m actually taking part in the Wellbeing Festival!

10 Things That Being a Mum Has Taught Me #Parenting

10 Things That Being a Mum Has Taught Me. 

When I was in my twenties, I was told I had a very slim chance of ever being a mum.  This news was utterly devastating to me as all I ever wanted was to have children of my own.  I believe it shaped my decision to marry an unsuitable man who already had children from a previous relationship. 

Fortunately, I did conceive, and although the doctors told me they didn’t believe I would go full term, my son ended up being two days late.  I then went on to have another two children and would have happily added to my brood had that unsuitable man been more…suitable!

Believing that motherhood would never be mine I was totally overwhelmed when I did finally hold my son for the first time.  That tiny bundle of happiness will be eighteen this year and that terrifies me more than the thought of giving birth. 

So what have I learnt over the years?  Here is my top ten: